When to Kill the Elf

To “Elf”, or Not to “elf” - THAT is the question.

I remember as a little kid, that Christmas was pure magic. My little family had next to nothing in material wealth, but my parents did the best they could on my dad's meager paycheck. We had an elf who “lived in the chimney” - my mom would go over and talk to it. (note: Invisible elves are easier to break up with than toy elves who sit all over the house.) So where did the magic come from? My insane parents – they tucked us into bed on Christmas Eve with stories of Santa Claus and Baby Jesus – right after we had hung a stocking – and then, after we drifted off to sleep, they began. The tree went up in the living room, candles in the window, sparkly tinsel and wreaths made from the trimmed branches of the tree. Toys that had to be built (insert tab A into slot B) were constructed. They were up ALL night. And when we woke up the next morning, it WAS magic!!! The decorations probably came from the Five and Dime, most of what was on the tree was homemade, boxes of tree tinsel cost a nickel each, but my mom hung EACH strand one at a time so it would look like rain cascading down the tree (No clumps of tinsel on HER trees!) What had been a plain old living room was suddenly Fairyland.

And that brings me round to the Elf. Kids look back on traditions as part of the stability of their childhood. I question if you start a tradition that is obviously going to have an end, then you need to also have a plan on how to end it. How do you tell the kids about Santa? When? How and when do you discuss “the elf”? When you end the elf, are you also ending the other fantasies? Is the little amount of time hiding the elf worth the repercussions of ending the magic too soon?

But I DO remember my mom talking about how much SHE missed her silly invisible elf – I know now it wasn't the elf – it was US and our innocent belief in the powers of said tattletale. And I remember missing the magic of the Holiday - even when I was a little older and helping decorate and doing charity work. We substituted new traditions, but there just wasn't “magic” - at least, not until the next generation of babies came along.

So – choose to not elf if you want – but please, not because you say you have too many other obligations (which reminds me that MY parents and grandparents had just as many – maybe the author of the article should have the kids help with the cookies and the nativity and make the paper chain themselves? She is right about picking and choosing activities, but sacrificing the elf that SHE brought into the house??? C'mon – you can move that little sucker around while you're brushing your teeth!) But after you have begun a long-standing tradition, be wary of suddenly just ending it – have a plan in place. It's a tough call on deciding when to draw the curtain on the magic show. Once you know how the lady doesn't get sawed in half, it's just a pretty, bendy, besequined lady folding herself up at one end and another person hiding in the foot of the box. No magic.